Have you ever noticed how easy it is to get caught up in what others are doing? I’ve read, watched, and participated in countless discussions about the jealousy, covetousness, and competitiveness that seems to thrive among my fellow black people. Perhaps this exists in other races and ethnicities too, but what I’ve observed and experienced often centers around our community. Phrases like “Monkey see, monkey do” and “Follow fashion dogs will catch mangy” are deeply ingrained in our culture. They capture the way some of us are quick to covet what others have or feel the need to move only when we see someone else make a move.
Growing up, I heard these phrases frequently, especially around Christmas. I remember hearing stories of people rushing to buy new furniture or appliances because their neighbors did the same, only to have those items repossessed because they couldn’t afford them. I’ve seen people open the same kind of business right next door to someone else, selling the same products. Some might argue that it’s just a coincidence, that maybe they had the same idea all along. But more often than not, the general belief is that this mentality stems from a lack of originality—a tendency to follow rather than lead.
As I’ve matured, I’ve faced similar situations and found myself wondering: Are we following others because we’re genuinely inspired by their growth, or is it just a case of “monkey see, monkey do”? To figure out where we stand, we need to take a deep look within ourselves and ask some hard questions:
- Why am I doing this?
- Has this always been my dream?
- Would I still want it if I hadn’t seen someone else with it?
- How does this align with my talents and resources?
- What benefits will come from this decision?
- How badly do I want this?
- Is this what God wants for me?
- If I don’t pursue this, how will it affect me and why?
- What difference will this make in my life or in the lives of others?
While these questions are just the beginning, they’re crucial in helping us understand our purpose and setting us on a path that’s truly our own. When we try to walk a path that wasn’t meant for us, we risk ending up in debt, stressed out, or failing because we never had a solid plan or the passion to overcome obstacles—because it wasn’t our dream, to begin with.
It’s time to refocus and start mapping out your personal roadmap. Step out of others’ shadows and into the light of your own purpose. Stay tuned for my next blog post, “Beyond Monkey See, Monkey Do: Crafting Your Unique Journey,” where I’ll delve deeper into this journey of self-discovery and personal growth.
